The Hardest Decision of Life

Decisions are part of our daily life. Usually decisions in our daily life are made in seconds or minutes. When it comes to the topic of death, decisions are never taken lightly. Usually, death is never a choice. Other times people would rather welcome death. Yes, the more controversial part of death, suicide or on a more specific note assisted suicide. Sometimes you are dealt with such a hard hand that your believe it is time to call it quits. The issue at hand is the choice of death. But how do you know know when it is the right moment to finally say “it is time?” How can you know for sure? If and when you make a decision, are you in your right mind? In certain states, people with terminal illness, by law, can have an assisted death. But this involves certification from two doctors as well as declaration of a sound mind. This controversial topic of taking your own life suggests that there are aspects besides yourself to consider which way defer your decisions. In analysis, when making the decision to end your life, can you truly be sure of this choice? A few different stories will be discussed in order to analyze this topic.

When making decisions there are many things to consider. For example, considering the pros and cons for yourself, then sometimes you have to consider the the people, like family and other loved ones, that are affected by this choice. This is what Sandy Bem, 64 year old Cornell psychology professor, had to contemplate. Sandy Bem’s story was published on May 14th, 2015 as an article in the New York Times Magazine. The article introduced Sandy Bem’s life before she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. After her diagnosis of Alzheimer’s, Sandy vowed that she would end her life before the symptoms of the the disease took over. When telling her husband, children and some close loved ones of her condition and her decision, no one tried to persuade her otherwise. Unfortunately, although a physician assisted suicide was allowed in the state Sandy lived in, it was only considered for terminally ill patients. “What I want, is to die on my own timetable and in my own nonviolent way” (qtd. in Henig) said Bem in her journal. After doing much research Sandy decided that pentobarbital would be the best way to end her life.

Several years pass after Bem’s diagnosis and some symptoms begin to come very apparent. But in 2012 Sandy’s daughter Emily has her child, Felix, making Sandy a grandmother. Sandy takes on the role of Felix’s grandmother quite easily, to her daughter’s surprise, who thought that this may make Sandy reconsider taking her life so soon. But Sandy was determined in her decision to take her life before the disease took it from her. By April of 2014 Sandy’s mind was deteriorating rapidly. Her daughter, Emily, finally came to understand her choices. Husband, Daryl had chosen Tuesday May 20, 2014 as the day for Sandy. And on that day, Sandy, surrounded by loved ones, took her life.

Throughout years as an Alzheimer’s patient, Sandy was adamant about taking her life. Although she was grateful for the time she got to spend with her grandson and her loved ones. She did not hesitate to take her life. To Sandy, her symptoms were taking away from her true self, and she has stood by the vow that she would end her life when the disease has taken that from her.

In another article written in the New York Times, Virginia Eddy came to a similar conclusion. In this short article, Virginia Eddy is introduced as a "little old lady in sneakers" (qtd. in “An Unusual Choice of Death”) by her son, Dr. David M. Eddy of Jackson. She had undergone two majors surgeries, one had resulted in complications and the other surgery was followed by incontinence and pneumonia. Soon after her eyesight was no longer intact. Virginia Eddy, who took pride in her self-sufficiency and simple pleasures, had understood it was her time and had made the decision to end her life. She wanted to leave a simple and nonviolent way and therefore chose to refuse fluids which took her life in a few days.

Alike to Sandy Bem, Virginia Eddy took pride in herself and knew after her health had failed, she was certain of her decision to take her own life. She died a peaceful death with no signs of pain. Eddy wanted her son to tell others of how this method worked well for her as a gift to the people. Her son wanted people to understand his mother lived a fulfilling life as a wife, mother and widow. She was known to walk throughout the town she resided in and lived happily in her home.

An additional story, written in the British Medical Journal, tells yet another story comparable to Sandy Bem and Virginia Eddy. In the article “A Doctor Who Chose an Assisted Death”, Henri Bataille is mentioned as a family doctor in rural southern Belgium. In his late 60’s Bataille was diagnosed with prostate cancer. After being in remission for half a decade it was uncovered that the cancer metastasized. This led the the request of an assisted death from Bataille. Unfortunately at the time he was admitted to a local Catholic hospital who had told them that this was not possible, even though assisted death is in fact legal in Belgium. He soon relocated to a different non-religious hospital. There, Bataille’s wife and daughter had promised to help him at all costs. A week later, on May 8th 2012, after a handful of goodbyes, three doctors came and administered the drugs to Henri Bataille to end his life.

Like Sandy Bem and Virginia Eddy, Henri Bataille made a decision. Bataille was in so much pain due to the cancer and the drugs. He knew that the combination would result in a painful death. So he opted to take his life on his timetable. His decision was made, and his family understood. And in the end, a clean shaven Bataille, who dressed in an outfit he ask his wife to bring, sat up in his hospital bed. “Thank you for allowing me to go the way I want to go,” (qtd. in Hurley) he said, as the doctors give him the drugs.

In another article, published in the New York Times Magazine, “A Life or Death Situation” you can see an opposition to the argument of where you can be truly sure when taking your own life. In this article, Brooke Hopkins has a bicycle accident resulting in severe head injury and breaking his neck causing him to stop breathing. The year prior to the day of the accident, Hopkins made a will stating that if he were ever in a situation of terminal illness or severe injury or in a vegetative state, he would not like to be resuscitated. And if his wife Peggy, who agreed and wrote about end of life bioethics, was will him that day she would have obliged. But as weeks passed after the incident, Peggy couldn’t bring herself to kill her husband. This accident left Brooke a quadriplegic, paralyzed from the neck down. Years after the accident, Brooke went back to teaching from his home and tried to live his life, good days and bad.

One day, Hopkins is having a panic attack threatening Peggy and the caretaker. They decide to give half a dose of Klonopin to him. Even after the Klonopin, Brooke insists he wanted to die and be unplugged from all the machines that were keeping him alive. He couldn’t deal with the frustration with the dependency he had for others. Peggy turns off all the machines as Brooke closes his eyes welcoming his death. Minutes pass and Brooke opens his eyes in confusion. He believed it was some sort of miracle that he survived. He asked his wife to turn on the machines and hours later he was back to teaching.

Brooke Hopkins was robbed of his death the minute his wife refused to do so. He had legally stated that if he were ever in a vegetative state he didn’t want any procedures done. And finally years after the accident when Brooke had asked to die, his wife knew he would survive without the machines because he wasn’t fully vend-dependent anymore. Furthermore, his wife stated that if he were to lose consciousness, she and the caretaker would revive him because to Peggy, Brooke didn’t really want to die (Henig). In retrospect, Brooke never really had a choice to die because his wife had made that decision for him. She had somewhat conned Brooke to believing he had an epiphany after surviving when he was unplugged from the machines.

So, do people really know if and when they want to die? Three similar cases were shown. Sandy Bem, a women who took pride in her intellect, knew from the day she was diagnosed she would take her life before the disease did. Virginia Eddy, an elderly patient who lived a fulfilling happy life, had understood it was her time after suffering through multiple surgeries, complications and other health issues. Henri Bataille, a family doctor and loving husband and father, would rather take his own life than wait in excruciating pain as the cancer and drugs did so. As for Brooke Hopkins, he was never really given his own choice. Rather his wife had done so for him. Although the decision to die is a hard one, in some cases it can be seen as the only one. And in those situations those people know that the choice they made is the right one.

Bibliography

An Unusual Choice of Death. (1994, July 20). Retrieved April 21, 2016, from

http://www.nytimes.com/1994/07/20/us/an-unusual-choice-of-death.html

Berghmans, Ron. "Decision-Making Capacity in Patients Who Are in the Early Stage of Alzheimer’s Disease and Who Request Physician-Assisted Suicide." Physician-Assisted Death in Perspective Assessing the Dutch Experience (n.d.): 229-46. Web. 21 Mar. 2016.

Henig, R. M. (2013, July 17). A Life-or-Death Situation. Retrieved April 21, 2016, from

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/07/21/magazine/a-life-or-death-situation.html?_r=0

Henig, R. M. (2015, May 14). The Last Day of Her Life. Retrieved April 21, 2016, from

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/17/magazine/the-last-day-of-her-life.html?_r=0

Hurley, R. (2015). A doctor who chose an assisted death. Bmj. doi:10.1136/bmj.h4385